Trust - The Broken Spine

00:00:00: Question, do you trust yourself?

00:00:16: Hello and welcome back.

00:00:18: Today's episode is about trust.

00:00:21: like respect it sits at the heart of any relationship.

00:00:25: Imagine what happens when trust has gone in your partnership or You lose it in a friend When you fail to build with your team And customers.

00:00:34: It's a word heavily used often proclaimed and demanded.

00:00:38: In particular leadership feels overused and increasingly empty.

00:00:43: Trust in leaders is in decline across organizations, governments and other institutions.

00:00:50: but trust is the spine of our society And what we are watching at every layer of it isn't just a system failure.

00:00:58: It's also a failure Of humanity.

00:01:00: Companies have firing thousands and replacing them with AI tools without fully understanding The value their human workers were delivering.

00:01:08: Politicians use trust as a campaign word while making decisions that are serving personal interests instead of the people who voted for them.

00:01:18: AI technology,

00:01:19: i.e.,

00:01:19: reshaping the entire world is being built in money-driven race and speed doesn't allow questions to be answered first.

00:01:28: Geopolitical instability driven by economic interest and ego falls on millions.

00:01:34: Social media prioritizing content with strong emotional triggers is driving polarization and misinformation, while established media channels that used to be the most trusted institutions are facing scrutiny and decline.

00:01:48: And trust between people and generations is breaking too!

00:01:52: From the individual to the organizational and societal level – The erosion of Trust Is Obvious.

00:01:58: What it's rarely considered is the volatility of trust.

00:02:02: When its given It has great power It becomes a connective tissue for everything else.

00:02:07: But it's fragile, and the effort of building it can be undone in a moment.

00:02:13: What happens to world where trust is broken?

00:02:15: How can we bring it back especially at age of AI?

00:02:19: In twenty-twenty one A group key employees openAI The company behind chatGPT looked at product being built And they decided that was wrong.

00:02:31: Among them were Dario Antoniella Amade.

00:02:35: Dario had been vice president of research.

00:02:37: He helped to build one the most important AI products millions people use today.

00:02:43: They left because they didn't trust how open AI was developing.

00:02:46: It was speed, values and safety considerations that did not match what they believed AI development required.

00:02:54: So they walked out and started Anthropic.

00:02:57: What they do is rare.

00:02:58: Most people in similar situations would have stayed.

00:03:02: A lot of people do it every day.

00:03:03: When something fills off and heading the wrong direction, raising concerns requires courage And willingness to risk our position.

00:03:12: We may send a considerate email and hope that message travels upward.

00:03:16: we hope the direction will change when raising concern goes nowhere.

00:03:23: This is what happens most of the time when people see something they cannot stand behind.

00:03:29: Walking away, like the Amadeus did isn't just a courageous decision but strongly driven by values and integrity.

00:03:36: Eventually it's self-trust decisions.

00:03:39: We have to trust ourselves enough believe that we could build in line with our values worth more than giving up.

00:03:47: Easier said then done.

00:03:48: I know this isn't a morality statement.

00:03:51: Values and integrity can be just as fleeting as trust, And the leaders who founded Anthropic on safety principles in a clear set of values are subject to same pressures every leader faces.

00:04:04: The Power Paradox episode made it clear – power can corrupt anyone….

00:04:09: …and competition especially in markets like AI technology... ...can change principles & values quickly!

00:04:15: The AI race is moving at full speed.. ..and its not a force any one control.

00:04:21: But over the past years, I've been watching several interviews with The Anthropic Leadership Team.

00:04:27: What i see overall is something worth naming.

00:04:30: In last year's interview with Anderson Cooper Amade was asked if he worried about the unknowns of building AI technology.

00:04:38: Without hesitation He said.

00:04:44: In an industry full of leaders who perform confidence, Amade admitted that even the people building this technology do not fully know where it is going.

00:05:14: Think about how rare it is to hear that from a CEO of company valued in the hundreds of billions.

00:05:21: What I see and him, And In The Way Other People From Anthropics Speak Is The Kind Of Leadership That Builds Trust Integrity Driven By Clear Values The Agency To Step Away From Work.

00:05:32: They Could Not Stand Behind And To Build Something Different.

00:05:36: responsibility and care for the second-and third order consequences, an honesty paired with self reflection when asked hard questions.

00:05:45: Now whether Anthrope can sustain that under pressure of market they are in?

00:05:50: I don't know!

00:05:51: Some their early commitments already being tested reshaped.

00:05:56: but seeing these qualities so far gives me reason to trust leadership a bit more than other players.

00:06:03: It also gives me hope for a different kind of leadership.

00:06:06: However, the corruptive force of politics and the competition driven by money make that hope more of a spark than a burning flame.

00:06:14: And The reason is not just this observation.

00:06:16: in my experience with leaders across industries & organizations We've lost trust in ourselves Trust In our voice & agency Because Our values & integrity get more & more shaped By the environment we accept & help to sustain.

00:06:32: Like the leader I described in The Power Paradox, despite good intentions she got shaped by the leadership of her boss.

00:06:40: We get pulled into the complexity of a society we don't question enough.

00:06:44: but trust at the individual level is another important foundation and it has also been quietly collapsing for years!

00:07:02: We follow the loudest voices and buy the products with the slickest marketing.

00:07:06: And we often click agree to terms & conditions without reading any of them.

00:07:11: Meanwhile, it feels more and more contradictory that technology is meant free us in multiple ways!

00:07:18: We're given the coolest productivity tools... ...and management has done its best put efficiency into everything Still…we have less time for many other things matter our lives and real leadership work.

00:07:32: We jump from meeting to meeting and squeeze in conversations with our team instead of giving them the space they require.

00:07:38: Energy gets put into managing up, instead of in leading those who need our guidance And focus sits on immediate output.

00:07:46: Instead of building the capabilities we need To work with AI!

00:07:49: We also get more controlled than ever before.

00:07:52: Opting out for being tracked almost everywhere is no longer just a couple annoying extra clicks but almost impossible.

00:07:59: Devices used by other people are now collecting data we never consented to share.

00:08:05: The environments, which quietly accept may not have changed our intentions to do the right

00:08:09: thing."

00:08:10: The wrong intentions clearly said somewhere else.

00:08:13: but these small exceptances compound into loss of self-trust and were living inside what those small decisions built as leaders and consumers.

00:08:23: The current leadership is a cumulative effect on millions trust choices The choices of what we buy and use, the leadership that we tolerate.

00:08:32: What we keep paying and trading for even when we know better.

00:08:36: companies That cut corners aren't doing it because they're all run by evil people.

00:08:41: They are doing it Because they can And the market is rewarding It.

00:08:45: leaders who walk back on their People in safety pledges under competitive pressures Are responding to the signal that We're sending.

00:08:57: Cost and profit matter more than values.

00:09:00: What we are getting now matters more then the consequences that follow later.

00:09:04: We're choosing and voting every day, just don't see it this way.

00:09:08: So when you look at leadership And say its broken You have to be willing To look our part.

00:09:14: in that equation Leadership only gets as good As a demand signal were sending.

00:09:20: If we want different leadership We must become A different audience.

00:09:24: And this starts with a question most of us hardly ask.

00:09:28: Do we trust ourselves?

00:09:30: Because trust in our selves matters just as much, as trust in others and it shapes what we expect from the people.

00:09:37: where supposed to follow.

00:09:39: if We don't trust ourselves To have agency to change something that doesn't seem right And if we don't trust ourselves to have any meaningful influence, We will stop trying.

00:09:58: That is how careless leadership sustains!

00:10:18: So what can one person possibly do?

00:10:23: I hear you.

00:10:24: Rarely, we get someone like Daria Amade admitting that they cannot predict everything for sure or Jack Clark his co-founder calling the frontier of AI a place of genuinely unknown unknowns.

00:10:36: If even those at the top cannot fully see consequences on how others are supposed to navigate this.

00:10:45: The complexity feels paralyzing And the whole AI fear narrative only amplifies it, but we cannot afford to lose our agency.

00:10:53: When development itself is moving too fast for anyone to fully understand when wrong leaders are holding strings... The worst thing that can be done is just hope!

00:11:03: We cannot hand responsibility over whoever is loudest who pretends they know where this is going and just hope everything will eventually work out.

00:11:15: What we have is smaller but more important, and that is to keep paying attention to what IS in our control.

00:11:22: Asking questions... ...and deciding which leaders we follow….

00:11:25: …and whose products we use.

00:11:27: Agency means to keep choosing consciously.

00:11:30: Each of those actions may feel small But they compound.

00:11:34: If enough of us started paying more attention To who builds what we use And what happens when their leaders are tested The market signal could shift.

00:11:42: The leaders building products with care would no longer be punished for it.

00:11:46: The people raising the right questions wouldn't be called fear mongers, and companies cutting corners will not be rewarded

00:11:54: anymore.".

00:11:54: The more we practice this…the more see what is in our control.

00:11:59: Research also confirms that trust & leadership are declining especially at top level.

00:12:05: Gardner ran a survey of over three thousand five hundred employees.

00:12:09: They asked them about Trust in their senior leaders.

00:12:12: The result was published in Harvard Business Review last December.

00:12:16: Only forty-eight percent said they trust the people needing their organization, so more than half don't trust them running companies that work for it.

00:12:25: Do you want to know why?

00:12:27: When researchers looked at what specifically broke that trust three behaviors stood out with holding information especially times of high uncertainty People are less likely to trust leaders who hide information from them or don't tell the whole story.

00:12:42: scapegoating, one of my favorites because I've seen it way too often.

00:12:47: most of us don't trust leaders who shift blame and responsibility for failures onto others or external factors.

00:12:53: The third behavior reversing decisions Leaders who backtrack under pressure.

00:12:59: And what do those three behaviors have in common?

00:13:04: They are often considered just a lack of communication skills, they aren't.

00:13:08: We can't fix them with the better town hall or more polished message!

00:13:12: These are primarily failures of self-trust and I want to make an important distinction because self trust gets often confused with self confidence but they're not the same.

00:13:23: Self Confidence is what we see from outside The decisiveness in clarity meetings The willingness to make decisions Or ability take a stand.

00:13:33: Self-trust is what sits underneath it.

00:13:35: It's the reliance on our own integrity, Our judgment and our values The conviction to act in line with What we actually stand for even under pressure.

00:13:45: So self trust Is the foundation?

00:13:48: Self confidence builds On top of it!

00:13:51: What We are seeing In many leaders today is different Super confident on the outside Shaky on the inside The performance of certainty and confidence without inner stability to support it, because the foundation of values in integrity is no longer there or has never existed.

00:14:08: But that gap between performance and foundation... ...is where trust breaks!

00:14:13: This is where confident humility comes back-in —the practice that keeps our confidence….

00:14:18: …and self-trust

00:14:19: connected.".

00:14:19: I talked about this in the Confidence Trap.

00:14:23: It's what allows a leader to say I made this decision, I stand behind it and was wrong confidently.

00:14:29: Without it the three trust breaking behaviours become almost inevitable.

00:14:34: Trust will always be volatile if not handled with care.

00:14:38: One political move quiet retreat under pressure or a time when we say one thing do another.

00:14:44: That is why trusts cannot be demanded.

00:14:46: We can't simply ask back once its broken.

00:14:50: The same Garner research found something else to consider.

00:14:58: Employees are more likely to trust senior leaders who show authentic concern for what they care about, so it's not confidence or charisma but authentic concern which is just another word for care.

00:15:12: Authentic Concern cannot be performed.

00:15:15: Leaders who genuinely care have done the inner work of knowing.

00:15:23: So, what is happening at the societal level right now... ...is not separate from what's happening at individual levels.

00:15:30: It's same pattern as a bigger scale!

00:15:33: At this scale trust doesn't collapse without millions of individual trust failures underneath.

00:15:39: it happens.

00:15:40: through leaders we accept The products that keep buying behavior we tolerate in our workplaces and personal lives And through voices we amplify or ignore.

00:15:52: We aren't just observers of the trust collapse, we're part of it.

00:15:56: In a blog article called Careless Leaders I talked about how cynicism protects the wrong kind of leadership.

00:16:02: because cynicism makes us stop believing that we hold any power to change things and once we start believing in our own agency... ...we stop using it.

00:16:12: Carelessness doesn't survive because there are too many careless leaders It survives because the rest of us stopped caring enough to challenge them.

00:16:21: Care begins where self-trust returns and self trust returns through small repeated conscious decisions.

00:16:29: The decision to question something instead of accepting it, To look at who built a tool before giving them our data And paying attention.

00:16:37: even when it is exhausting We still decide.

00:16:41: So let me return the questions I asked earlier.

00:16:45: Can we bring Trust back especially in age of AI?

00:16:49: Yes by being the leaders we want to follow and using our agency, To help establish that kind of leadership everywhere else.

00:16:57: Our Agency isn't as small a cynicism can make us believe.

00:17:01: it just takes more consistency.

00:17:03: consider the compounding effect.

00:17:05: if We start investing into It today And add Just A little More from now on it will Make a difference.

00:17:12: So what are The Practices That Help Us?

00:17:16: and to build trust with others in such a complex environment.

00:17:20: To give you that is the job of my next reflection episode, what I want to leave you today are simple observations.

00:17:28: So ask yourself where have i stopped paying attention?

00:17:32: Do I Trust The Products I Use?

00:17:34: Which type Of Leaders do I Follow ?

00:17:37: Do People Trust Me?

00:17:39: What Are The Kinds Of Values I Stand For?

00:17:41: Even When They Might Become Inconvenient Notice where your self-trust has eroded through what you have accepted, Where you stayed quiet because raising a question fell too costly.

00:17:53: Each of those moments is the small loss of agency and each of them Is something that you can choose to interrupt Certainly not all at once.

00:18:02: but The fact That You Stayed With Me To This Point Tells me Something Important About YOU And THAT IS THAT YOU CARE!

00:18:09: You care enough to accept me saying We are all part of the trust erosion and that we need to reclaim our agency.

00:18:17: Trust starts with us, And so does care!

00:18:20: They go hand in hand because trusting someone who doesn't care could be naive... ...and care without trust easily reads as manipulation.

00:18:29: Let's explore what genuine care looks like In this episode called Daring To Care.

00:18:35: Stay curious, stay tuned.

00:18:37: Thanks for tuning into The New Work Playbook Where work gets better, because people matter.